Have you been feeling like you have to be supermom at all times, or your household will fall apart? Like if you don’t handle it, then how will it ever get done? When’s the last time that you took time to relax, read your favorite book, or even just get outside and connect with nature? Better yet, when’s the last time you went and enjoyed the sugar ecstasy that is a great donut or visited your favorite barista for a caffeine fix?
I know that when I’m feeling disconnected from myself, things like being present and authentic with Ford and Brock can be hard to find within. When it comes to being a Mom, I’m always trying to make sure Ford has everything he needs continually throughout every day, while also staying on top of my work, making dinner at night, and taking time after our son is asleep to connect with my husband.
Forget worrying about having time to spend with my friends or going to the movies, right? Yes, all of these are possible to achieve without feeling like you are strung so thin you’ve got nothing left. Something as mothers we need to do more often, is learn to slow down.
Learning to slow down can be quite difficult to take on, especially for those of you mothers that have never done it before. It truly is a practiced art in the journey of being a Mother. Today, I want to share a few things that I’ve done in the course of becoming a Mom that have helped me slow down and be present to it all.
Routine. Do you even have one anymore? I know for a while after Ford was born, that I completely lost track of mine. The routine became focusing my energy on all things baby, and before I realized it, I had lost connection with who I was. It can sound so cliché at times, but slowing down and being present to you, truly has an impact on the experience of motherhood. When you become present, you’re in a state of full awareness, where each moment has its own technicolor beauty to it. Slowing down and finding your routine again creates a space to be able to be in the here and now. When you have your routine flowing every day, your baby naturally becomes present to it as well.
Appreciate the chaos. Raising children really is organized chaos more often than not. If you’re like me, finding the time to maintain your work schedule and mothering at the same time can feel like a never ending cycle of chaos. Learning to slow down and be present helps you to stop resisting the ebb and flow of it all, and focus fully where you want to be focused…on giving your child and husband love, compassion, and time. So often as a mom, we can feel like there’s not enough time in the day for everything that must get done. Yet, what can be found in something as simple as slowing down is that you do, in fact, have more than enough time to give the same amount of attention, care, and love to all of the things that matter in your day.
Forgive yourself. Motherhood has so many multi-faceted layers to it, and I know I’m constantly discovering new ones every day in my journey with Ford. However, so many of those times we can feel like we’re not doing enough to care for our child and our family. The struggle is real on our mental load every day. When I take even a few minutes a day to focus on me, I find it can make quite the difference on the rest of the day when I forgive myself for not being able to get everything done I think I have to. Most of the time, it’s our own personal demands on our productivity that we’re trying to live up to. Giving ourselves grace can be freeing, and give you the ability to discover that living in the moment is far more fulfilling than stressing over what is or isn’t getting done each day.
Find your support system. This is something so beautifully simple, yet a major facet of motherhood that we refuse to give ourselves permission to do. Ask for help. Asking for help isn’t admitting defeat, but it allows your partner to support you in the ways that you want to be supported. Allow them the ability to show up for you, and you’ll discover that slowing down is easier than you thought.
What are some ways you can give yourself time to slow down and be present today?